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Our Children's Chores and Allowance
Allowance is something we give as long as my dh is working. As a computer consultant, he sometimes goes through periods of time when he is not working and when that happens, allowance generally stops because we just pay the essentials. When all is right in our financial world, our children get their allowance once a month. They each get 1.00 a week for every year of their age. So Jack, who is 10, can get $40-50 a month. This comes with a 'hitch'. Their allowance is what they have to buy things they want. Toys, video games, CDs, etc. We buy clothes, but if they want something special that I might consider a bit frivilous in the clothing line, they would have to purchase that themselves. If something comes up that they want, they have to wait until the next time allowance rolls around. I encourage them to keep a list of things they want so when they get their allowance, they can have that to remind them instead of picking up the first thing they see. I have also shared the joys of yard sale shopping, ebay, and thrift stores and how they can stretch their dollars further...
Now on to chores...
I am conflicted about chores. When my mother was a child, she was sent to live with her grandparents until she was 10, then she was brought home to do chores. She cleaned, cooked, etc. So when I was a child, she didn't expect much out of me because she felt she had been robbed of her child hood. I brought in the mail, helped clean (more because I wanted to help her than because she asked me to because she never asked me to), and i emptied the dishwasher. Sometimes I cooked dinner when I was older. I also mowed on the riding mower, but again, because I wanted to and liked it. My husband grew up where his mom did pretty much everything for him (and guess who is picking up after him now...) So I strive to be more middle of the road.
A couple of years ago, I heard about the idea of chore jars. I picked out 14 basic chores (sweep and scrub Kitchen floor, clean mirrors and sinks in bathroom, that sort of thing). Four days a week (the days we do school work) they each draw a chore to do. If I have time, I will hit something in the room they are working in (like cleaning the chandelier in the dining room). Most chores don't take them more than 15 minutes, sometimes as much as 30. This way, I am teaching them to clean up and how nice it looks when they are done, but I am not makig it in such big chunks that they hate it. They don't always do it perfectly, but I work really hard not to criticize or redo it behind them. My goal is not perfection, but giving them responsibility, teaching them for when they are grown and freeing up some of my time.
They do have things they are in charge of regularly (Jack gets the mail, Katrina feeds the cats and rabbits). Jack is also becoming our lawn mower because my knee is prohibiting me from doing it. Chores don't get paid for, the allowance isn't linked to the chores. They receive allowance to teach them financial responsibility and because they are part of our family and share in our resources. They do chores because they are part of our family and we have to work together to get things done...
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September 13, 2007 12:51 AMI am enjoying all the good advice I am finding today! Thanks for the post.
About not critisizing or re-doing it behind them, I think that is great, but I think it is also important to keep watch as they do it, and make suggestions about how to accomplish the job more fully, show how to hold the rag to get in the cracks, etc. Make it clear that the job should be done as well as possible.
I like that allowance is sharing in the family resources, and chores are something we just all have to do. Good idea...
September 13, 2007 2:30 PMVery good ideas.
September 13, 2007 8:32 PMSometimes I wonder if I work my kids too hard but then I look around and see that all the messes are theirs! I would feel worse if I was cleaning them up so I go ahead and let them do it. They always have the option of not making messes in the first place!
September 16, 2007 10:30 PMGreat advice ~ We don't pay for chores, either. We pay them to do something that we would otherwise pay someone else to do ~
http://tonsofsons.wordpress.com/
September 26, 2007 6:47 PMI have to say, I really think this system sounds pretty good! I hesitate on paying for certain chores that should be apart of being in the family...but we do have a reward system so they get a taste on how it is to earn.
In fact, I just posted on this today for WFMW as well...you'll have to go take a peek at it. :)
